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Counseling  Corner Archives



Counseling Corner titles listed below:  (Select the title to read message)


2009

 -Repentance and Cleansing

 -Repentance Unto Salvation

-The Disappearance of True Repentance

2008

-Where Your Treasure Is

-The Spirit of Bondage

-The Burden of A Heavy Heart

-The Peril of Complacency

-Fear - A Volatile Emotion

2007
-Spiritual Warfare

-The Whole Armor of God

-The Way Of The Cross
2006
-What Is My Purpose

-Unforgiveness

-The Cry for Gentleness
2005
-Christian integrity...

-Second in a series on Christian Integrity

-Third in a series on Christian Integrity


2004

-Refusal To Receive Counseling
Year Unknown
-Sin Is The Problem

-Holiday Loneliness

-The Accursed Thing
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Repentance and Cleansing
Rev. Don Loss


 This is the third Counseling Corner written on repentance. I want to speak of the importance of the need for a full examination of one’s sin after he has made a profession of faith. Asking forgiveness for one’s sins against God and entering into the new birth (II Corinthians 5:17) is a wonderful experience. But, we must not stop there. Our lives of sin before coming to God have left a track record of defilement and there needs to be a cleansing on our part by confessing sins that we have participated in. “Beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from everything that contaminates and defiles body and spirit, and bring our consecration to completeness in the reverential fear of God.” (II Corinthians 7:1, The Amplified Bible).

 It is my experience that many who have repented unto salvation and have indeed been washed; “you were washed, sanctified, justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of God.” (I Corinthians 6:11) are not experiencing victory in their walk. They are living with a multitude of sins that have never been confessed. These must be dealt with in order to experience the grace and peace of God fully. Some believers still have resentment, bitterness, rage, immorality, anxiety, fear, bondages, infidelity, deception, addictions, jealousy, depression, etc. Their “sin-trained” flesh has been active in the former lifestyle. Guilt and shame still haunt them in many cases. While reading from various sources I ran across this work from the evangelist, Charles Finney; “General confessions of sin will never do. Your sins were committed one by one, and as best you can they should be reviewed and repented one at a time.”

And that may be what you have neglected. Have you failed the admonition to “cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the flesh and spirit”? I suggest you start by confessing your sins that have not been addressed and you will experience a heavy load lifted off of your shoulders.

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” I John 1:9

I have heard over and over again from my counselees that when they go through the process of repentance through confession of their sins, they feel so much relief. Here are some suggestions for this repentance exercise:

1) Get alone with your Bible, pen and paper.
2) Read the first chapter of I John, especially focusing on verse 9.
3) Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal all those things that break or hinder your fellowship with Him.
4) Write them down - make a list. Things may come to you over the next several days.
5) One by one, confess each sin separately outloud. Agree with God that it is sin.
6) Ask forgiveness based on I John 1:9.
7) Thank God for forgiveness and cleansing.
8) Renounce each sin in turn - declare that Satan no longer has a part in your life in that area of your life.
9) Ask the Holy Spirit to fill that area of your life and put a guard over it.
10) Announce that this area now belongs to God.

You should feel a great relief after you have done this. Your intimacy with God will be enhanced since sin in your life will no longer be grieving the Holy Spirit.

Enjoy the blessing and keep short accounts of your sins from now on.

Repentance Unto Salvation
Rev. Don Loss

Over the years I have seen many make professions of faith, but not all of these that professed sorrow over their sins had a heart to forsake their sins. It’s quite a task to discern whether a person really is born-again in many cases. Are we not reminded of the Scriptural text; “This people honors Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me.”? Mark 7:6 When a person’s heart is far from Christ, “the enemy comes in like a flood” (Isaiah 59:19) taking that person captive to do the devil’s will.

When issues are not dealt with at the cross, we find those who have hurts, loneliness, rejection, anger, anxiety, depression, bondages, etc., floundering around trying to find relief for these legitimate issues. And, thankfully, some do find relief and are rescued by God’s common grace that He supplies to the world. But many soon fall back into their former condition and the cycle continues. Meanwhile, disappointments, heartaches, resentment, helplessness, etc., invade the whole family atmosphere. But, it is not hopeless!

At Bethel Colony, we help men examine their lives to discover whether or not they have a clear understanding of repentance. Many have made professions of faith at some point in their lives but they have built their lives on the sand. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus says; “But everyone who hears these sayings of mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.” Matthew 7:26 He also says; “But why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord’ and not do the things which I say?” Luke 6:46 These sayings are exactly what Jesus wants every professing believer to consider, whether or not he really is a true believer. Has he truly repented of his sins? If he is backslidden he has given evidence of living in his sins instead of forsaking them. There are many professing believers living in sin for one reason or another - to get their needs met, loss of conviction of sin, carelessness, ignorance and lust to name a few. And, we have all seen heartache as a result.

Now what about repentance unto salvation? A repentance unto salvation must be made at the foot of the cross. This is where the power of saving grace comes in. A person must truly examine himself to see if he has been fooling himself. As was noted in the last newsletter; “true repentance will be after a godly manner. For a man repents when he turns to God, sees his conduct as God sees it (sin), submits to God’s judgment and asks God to forgive him.”

I have led many to Christ who have had some sort of church background but never were truly saved. I take them to various Scriptures showing the way of salvation. An acknowledgment of their sins and their offense against God comes to light. They see that Christ died for their sins in a new and fresh way. They repent of their sins, and behold, there is a sense of a weight lifted off of them, a burden removed, and the peace of God floods in. They then enter into the Kingdom of God as “a new creation; old things have passed away and all things have become new.” II Corinthians 5:17 Their countenance is lifted, salvation has come, and they rejoice! Truly a supernatural repentance unto salvation has taken place. New help has arrived from above for their issues. And God , in His love, will help them. For we know who this God is, He is the God of the Scriptures. He is Jesus Christ. Look what He says; “Come unto Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you REST!” That, my friends, is the power of the gospel. Oh, what a Savior!

Do you have repentance unto salvation? Have you been living a lie? Surrender now and come to Jesus at the cross. Ask forgiveness for your sins for He will surely save you!

Until next time, the Lord bless you,

The Disappearance of True Repentance
Rev. Don Loss

 Any counseling that does not exhort one to true repentance is on sinking sand. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said; “Therefore, everyone who hears these sayings of Mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.” Matthew 7:26

It is astounding the number of professing believers in Christ who have no clue about the spirit of repentance. True repentance is a heartfelt sorrow for sin. Heartfelt sorrow over sin does NOT focus on what one has lost as a result of negligence, rebellion, irresponsibility, carelessness, lusts, passions, disobedience, idolatry, greed, or covetousness. That is “worldly sorrow” and it produces death.  II Corinthians 7:10

R.V.G. Tasker’s commentary on II Corinthians says concerning this worldly sorrow; “Sorrow for wrong doing which leaves God out of account is merely remorse, that melancholy compound of self-pity and self-disgust. So far as healing and uplifting, remorse depresses and embitters.”

I don’t know about other counselors, but in my experience, I often see a “form of repentance” that is likened to a “form of godliness” which the Apostle Paul speaks of in II Timothy 3:5. Paul writes that this disposition has no power because it denies the intent to become godly, to be conformed to the image of Christ, or to walk in the spirit of obedience. Is this not the same problem with repentance we see today in those who profess Christ and have a “form of repentance” and deny it’s power? And, may I be so bold to say that any program that does not exclusively require repentance at the foot of the cross, and sorrow for sin against Jesus Christ may have a form of repentance but is still denying it’s power.

I am reminded of Paul’s admonition to the church at Corinth when he writes “For Christ did not send me to baptize, but to preach the gospel, not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of no effect. For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” I Corinthians 1:17-18

I think of the prodigal son who “wasted his possessions”, lost all that he had and ended up feeding swine. Can we not see what his greatest burden was?... “I have sinned against heaven and before you.” Luke 15:18 His first priority was his sorrow for sin against his father. It was not a worldly sorrow but a godly sorrow.

R.V.G. Tasker writes concerning godly sorrow; “All sorrow that leads to repentance can truly be said to be after a godly manner. For a man repents when he turns to God, sees his conduct as God sees it (sin), submits to God’s judgment and asks God to forgive him.” (Parentheses added.)

The Greek word for repentance, metanoia, means “a change of mind”. According to The Evangelical Dictionary of Theology, it “denotes that inward change of mind, affections, convictions, and commitment rooted in the fear of God and sorrow for offenses against Him which, when accompanied by faith in Jesus Christ, results in an outward turning from sin to God and His service in all of life.”

As the Apostle Paul said to the body of Christ; “I have much to say” concerning this subject. My counsel to you is to make sure you have a godly sorrow and not a worldly sorrow for truly, godly sorrow will work a healing balm to your wounded and tormented soul. Hoping to shed some light into your soul.

Where Your Treasure Is "2008"
Rev. Don Loss

My wife, Cathi, and I have recently returned from a visit to Scotland and Ireland. Both countries are beautiful beyond description but the Isle of Skye, off the west coast of Scotland, especially won our hearts. We fell in love with the people and the beauty of the island. We were treated royally by a precious Parish Minister and his dear wife as we stayed in their home for four days. They fed us royally, showed us some of the most beautiful sites we have ever seen, and introduced us to many of their friends who live on the island as well. It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience which we will treasure in our hearts and minds for years to come. Out of all of our travels around mainland Scotland and Ireland, the Isle of Skye won our hearts more than any other place we saw or visited. It is definitely our preference!

In similar manner, unless our hearts are won for Christ above all other experiences, our hearts will be divided, compromised or lukewarm for the things of God. We may be Christian in some ways, but not all the way. The Scripture says; "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Luke 12:34

A treasure is anything you cherish or value highly. It could be a person, a reputation, money, possessions, or any type of indulgence that will give pleasure to the flesh. It is very difficult to treasure the virtue of purity when one is enjoying a fling with a mistress, or sexual indulgences with a girlfriend for; "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Professing Christians are often guilty while justifying their forbidden fruit in the name of love or saying; "God understands".

And let us not forget the millions that are abusing drugs and alcohol. It is a love affair with a substance that is seen as the cure-all. Some like the feeling it gives them even at the expense of risking all that it will cost them. Some use it as an escape mechanism from the difficulty or hurt that they are experiencing, abandoning all reason. Some use in order to have a moment of relaxation, a sedative, relief from pressures. Whatever the motive, it is a desire that in the end will kill the user; either emotionally, physically or both. If you love that which God condemns, you will lose that which you love most. Almost always that includes family.

One wonders whatever happened to Demas who was a co-laborer with Paul the Apostle in Philemon v.23. We know that Scripture tells us in II Timothy 4:10 that Demas forsook Paul "having loved this present world". Whatever enticed Demas to return to the love of the world is not surprising. There are many today who have professed Christ and have gone the way of Demas in one degree or another. Their lives drift into the snare of the serpent who deceives them into believing that they can live as they please without consequence.

It is our desire to counsel those who are in bondage to their sinful choices to acknowledge their disobedience, repent of their sins, and to love Jesus first and foremost. Until they see that their primary offense is against God, it will be difficult for them to see the cross and the width, length and depth of His love for them. This perfect love will, by its nature, melt the heart of the one who has been rescued from blindness and has made Jesus their first love.

When Jesus is treasured in your heart above everything else, your heart will always be warm toward Him. "Did not our heart burn within us while He talked with us?" Luke 24:32 It will no longer be a burden to obey laws; it will be a delight to love Him. The obedience to Him will flow naturally out of the one who is deeply in love with Jesus.

May I ask you...Do you have a "heart" problem? Is your heart cold, divided, compromised in the love of God? Have you considered the Scripture; "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also"? Think about it! Are you ready to give your heart to Jesus and make Him your treasure above everything else? Oh, my friend, do it! The Savior is waiting.


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The Spirit of Bondage "2008"
 Rev. Don Loss


One of the unclean spirits that we deal with is the spirit of bondage as men and women who come under the power of addiction have given place to this spirit. They have violated the clear imperative of the Scriptures; “...nor give place to the devil”, in Ephesians 4:27. Sadly, many are trying to help these people with the wisdom of the world. “For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds.” II Corinthians 10:3&4. The weapons we are talking about are part of the full armor of God which includes the offensive weapons of the sword of the spirit and aggressive warfare prayer. (Eph.4:17-18) We must take out the strongholds of bondage by attacking the unclean spirit that has built a fortress as a result of habitual sinful behavior. At some point, a person loses the capacity to will what he would like to will; to stop whatever indulgence that has given the devil permission to take advantage or ground given...”in order that no advantage be taken of us by Satan.” II Corinthians 2:11

A contemporary song-writer, Kenny Chesney, has a clear picture of the torment of a soul. Let’s look at his lyrics from the song, “Demons”, to give you an idea what I am saying:

Sometimes they’re in a bottle,
Sometimes a pair of high-heeled shoes,
Some come rolled up in paper
Some have six strings and only play the blues.
Once you meet the devil,
There ain’t no way he’ll let you be
When I’m not chasing demons;
There’s demons chasing me.

Do you see what the demons have used to put people in bondage? A bottle (alcohol), high-heeled shoes (lust), rolled up in paper (drugs), six strings and playing the blues (depression). Does this sound familiar? That’s just the first stanza. The third stanza really expresses the strength of the craving for the things that one has “given place” to the devil.

There’s things that I can’t leave alone
Cause they won’t leave me alone.
What I want ain’t what I need;
Still I reach for the things that I crave
Then try to run away.
Am I afraid of being free?
Cause when I’m not chasing demons;
There’s demons chasing me.

Let me interpret for you the demonic stronghold mentioned here: “Still I reach for the things that I crave”...represents the things that the demon has one in bondage to; like the things written in the first stanza...“When I’m not chasing demons”.

Then there’s the other phenomenon; “There’s demons chasing me”. This is the terrible state of the actual torment of the one who is in bondage to the devil’s will through alcohol, drugs, etc. Matthew 5:16 talks about “those who were tormented by unclean spirits.”

The devil torments those who have given place to him and those tormenting spirits need to be driven out. There are exceptions where people are set free from the spirit of bondage by repentance and the grace of God. Our experience is that 85 - 90% of the men who come to Bethel have to go through intentional deliverance in order to be set free. Those who have given occupation to the devil in their souls and body can and do receive deliverance from evil spirits.

You may be asking; I see myself there, what can I do? Repent of the particular bondage that has taken you captive; drugs, alcohol, lust, self-condemnation, guilt, depression, etc. Make a list of other sins against God and repent of each one. This will help bring about your deliverance.

God is able to deliver you and wants to set you free. Prayerfully put on the armor of God by reading Ephesians 6:13-18. Make it personal: “I take up the whole armor of God. I put on the helmet of salvation, the breastplate of righteousness, etc...” Take your authority by quoting Luke 10:19. Command the spirit of bondage to come out quietly and discreetly in the name of Jesus. Jesus will set you free. (John 8:36) Then get back in love with the Lord and His Word. Put on the armor of God daily for your protection. We’re always here to help you.


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The Burden of A Heavy Heart "2008"
 Rev. Don Loss

As I think of all the heartache that evolves when a member of one’s family goes out on the limb of substance abuse, it is overwhelming. If the loved one has left the way of the Lord and has gone the way of folly, it is only a matter of time, for the seed of foolishness will tear apart any meaningful relationship. Once a person has lost his footing in righteousness, he will suffer loss. The backslider in heart will be filled with his "own" ways. (Proverbs 14:14) He will more than likely fall into a spirit of impulsiveness. As one Princeton theologian has written; "he will be like a feather in the wind of temptation." And the wind of sin can be very turbulent as we all know. It is a whirlwind of confusion of which God is NOT the author. The loved one has left the rock of responsibility and discipline, falling headlong over the cliff of folly. (Romans 14:29) "But a sound heart is life to the body." (Proverbs 14:30) Oh, that our loved ones would leave their madness and return home. "Truly the hearts of the sons of men are full of evil, madness is in their heart, while they live." (Ecclesiastes 9:3)

The sad thing about this situation is that so often the family that experiences this burden has drifted from the way of the Lord as well. If this is the case, it aggravates the means that are needed in times such as these: encouragement, prayer, worship, fellowship with other members of the body of Christ. "And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some...." (Hebrews 10:24-25) If this is your case, return to the body of Christ. You will need their love, understanding, prayers and encouragement. God Himself will comfort you in your tribulation. "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all of our tribulations that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves are comforted by God." (II Corinthians 1:3-4)

I would encourage you in your heart-breaking relationship to daily pray Ephesians 6:10-18, making it personal. I suggest you write it daily until it is etched in your spirit; for you will need it. Be prepared for a lot of lies, since those in bondage to substance abuse are entrenched in a stronghold of deception, trying to keep what they have already lost - their dignity and integrity. It is the nature of the beast. At some point, the attempt to hide the unbearable will be exposed. At this point, the challenge must be made to get help. The help needs to be biblically based. The person confronted must come to a spirit of repentance. It is about his sin against God and his fellow man. The prodigal son said; "I will arise and go to my father, and will say to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you.’" (Luke 15:18)

Ask God to give you a spirit of gentleness if you are in this difficult situation. You are going to be hurt. Ask God’s grace for you to receive those fiery darts in love. For you see, the one hurting you is grasping for straws. He is doing harm to you because of a futile attempt to save what he has already lost (the relationship). Hurt people hurt people. You, be gentle still. It will be hard, but the rewards are great.

One last thing is on my mind. This is a spiritual battle and you are fighting the spirits of darkness in your heartbreaking situation. When you are communicating (or trying to) with the one that may hurt you in words and will bring a spirit of confusion in your conversations, pray this way:  "I bind any communications being addressed to me that is authored by evil spirits, and I only receive communication between (insert name) and me that is authored by the Holy Spirit."  You will be amazed at the difference in the outcome. You have taken authority, which God has given you, and brought the communication on your grounds in the Spirit of the Lord. (Luke 10:19)

Our hearts are burdened with you who are suffering. We know that God is faithful to His Word. He has promised to lighten your burden. "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28) "Fear not; I am with you. Be not discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)


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The Peril of Complacency "2008"
Rev. Don Loss

In dealing with people who have issues, I am reminded of the Scripture; "These people draw near to Me with their mouth and honor Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me. And, in vain they worship Me...." Matthew 15:8-9. There is a pretension that all is well with the Lord while lives are filled with the wages and consequences of sin. In their complacency they’ve lost or have suppressed the truth about the evil of sin. They call that which is evil good, and that which is good evil. And we find that many are no longer pricked in their conscience about the evil of sin when this occurs. You will see God’s people living in various lusts, sexual immorality and addictions without a conscience. Puritan preacher, Stephen Charnock, comments on this plight; "One never chooses evil because it is evil, but because he sees it to be good." Is this not the end of complacency?

Just what is complacency? It is "unconcern, self-satisfaction accompanied by unawareness of actual dangers or deficiencies." either morally or mentally. Haven’t we all scratched our heads in disbelief over why our loved ones are living in contempt of God’s holy word. They have left a life of virtue to a loose primitive way of living. They are exemplifying unsophisticated behavior that is unaffected by objective reasoning. Addiction, lying, manipulation, seduction, irresponsibility, adultery, fornication, greed, etc., to note some of the unsophisticated behaviors. From the latter behavior becomes a flood of misery.

This quote from Flannery O’Connor’s letters caught my eye concerning the complacent soul; "It is the complacent heart, the soul unmoved by its own misery, it’s own lack of love, that renders the creature most resistant to grace."

So, what is the answer to this pitiful state? First of all, we must understand this is a spiritual problem. The wisdom and well-meaning intent of the world can only band-aid the problem and the bleeding may never stop. Why? Because secular institutions lack the ministry of grace where the counsel, teaching and preaching of the Word of God is administered. As the Psalmist has written in Psalm 60:11 - 12; "Give us help from trouble, for the help of man is useless. Through God we will do valiantly, for it is He who shall tread down our enemies."

And, may I add; let us not water-down sin, the message to address sin, and the God who alone can remedy sin. Confessing of sin to a god we understand without the cross will not administer grace. Then, what will? "For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved, it is the power of God." I Corinthians 1:18 God will bestow grace upon the captive and broken-hearted soul. "I thank my God always concerning you for the grace of God which was given you by Christ Jesus, that you were enriched in everything by Him in all utterance and knowledge, even as the testimony in Christ was confirmed in you." I Corinthians 1:4 - 6; Paul’s letter to the church at Corinth.

You may be wondering; is there hope for me or my loved one with a spirit of complacency? Certainly so! Return to the cross and repent of your complacency. Review where you began to slide away, get alone with God, make a list of the sins you committed in your waywardness, ask for forgiveness for each sin and repent, forsaking all those sins, and commit yourself to walk with God. Return to your local church and begin afresh with the assembly of the people of God. If the problem persists, we are always ready to help. We will minister the grace of God to you through counsel, teaching and preaching Christ Jesus "in demonstration of the Spirit and of power." I Corinthians 2:4


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Fear - A Volatile Emotion "2008"
Rev. Don Loss

I would like to address the spirit of fear that we are all susceptible to experiencing. This emotion can overrun us before we know what hit us. It is like a flood that gains strength coming down a mountain stream. You are sitting by the bank not suspecting or seeing the coming deluge. Then you hear the noise, fear sets in, you see the wall of water approaching, fear rises up, the wall of water hits, sweeps you away, and fear engulfs you.

How can this happen? It can happen in many ways, but the focus I am taking concerning fear is in the realm of relationships. We can all relate when we get an unexpected phone call, an unexpected delay where one you love doesn’t show up, an unexpected abnormality when a spouse doesn’t show up with a paycheck and the T.V. is gone, an unexpected jolt when your children have made choices that endanger their lives, a sickness that devastates a child’s or other loved one’s health, and other unexpected situations that have fallen on some of you reading this article.

You may be like King David who cried out to God, "My heart is severely pained within me....fearfulness and trembling have come upon me...and terrors...have fallen upon me." Psalm 55:4&5. Did you notice that David cried out to God in prayer? "Give ear to my prayer, O God, and do not hide yourself from my supplication."

This is the first step in handling fear. "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard our hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6&7

More than likely you’ll need some warfare prayer to get to the place of peace. In my own experience, I have succumbed to a spirit of fear in a fearsome scenario that would begin to race in my mind, with a resultant fear in my heart and a churning in my stomach. Unknowingly, Satan takes advantage of the fear and "the enemy comes in like a flood...." Isaiah 60:2.

At this point, you must take authority over the spirit of fear that is racing through the mind with all kinds of imaginations. You must pray with authority against the spirit of fear and command it to leave you. You must bind any thought that is flooding through your mind that is authored by the enemy, and only receive communication in your mind that is authored by the Holy Spirit! I have found that this will help subdue the spirit of fear. But even after doing all this, I have still had an awful feeling in my abdomen. As I began to praise the Lord, I have felt a release come through me and felt the peace of God. It was the Scripture manifesting itself in my whole being; "when the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard against him." Isaiah 50:19

After the spirit of fear has been disarmed, you need to take a position on the firm foundation of the Word of God. Speak out loud the Scriptures: "For God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and a sound mind." II Timothy 1:7 Now take advantage of that word ‘love’. For you see, it’s God’s love for us that will magnify His protection over us since He is the "Great Shepherd of the sheep..." in Hebrews 13:20. It is this perfect love that He has for us and our knowledge of it that will cast out fear.

So, let’s lay the sword of the spirit into our enemy with this verse; "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." I John 4:17

It is this stand of our trust in God that has been accomplished through prayer, warfare in the mind, and in resting ourselves in the arms of the Great Shepherd that will manifest itself in "the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."


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The Way of the Cross "2007"
Rev. Don Loss

Whatever happened to the cross in counseling? Are life’s issues so difficult that something other than the Scriptures are needed to address them? "The words that I speak to you are spirit and life." John 6:63 If a troubled person is not saved, it is one of the greatest opportunities to introduce him to the message of the cross.

"This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners." I Timothy 1:15 I have led many to Christ in the initial counseling session.

Others, who said they were Christians, find out that they never really have trusted Christ for their salvation. "Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock; and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock. But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall." Matthew 7:24-27

Also, it is a marvelous opportunity to address backsliding and to exhort the counselee to "return to their first love". Revelation 2:4-5

Counseling is a process of helping people to see their sin and their responsibility, to own it and to take it to the cross. The counselee will need to look at the past, any grievances, emotional scars from various incidents, and his loss of identity. It is the purpose of biblical counseling to rescue a person from this dungeon of darkness and bring hope and light into the myriad of situations that he/she has gotten themselves into. This can only be accomplished fully in Christ Jesus.

What a joy it is to take a broken person to the cross, seeing him find relief from his guilt and shame and love from Almighty God, no matter what they may have done in the past! As one has said, even the most monstrous sin is able to be forgiven and cleansed at the cross.

It is the nature of a season in darkness to separate one from the sense of God’s presence. In this darkness, one tends to look to solving his problems and circumstances rather than looking at his sin against God and his sin against others. It’s a spiraling abyss to get one’s needs met by circumventing the way of the cross. We all hear the cries; "If he or she would only.....", "If I had not been mistreated by.....", "If my wife (or my husband) would give me another chance.....", "If I could only get them to love me.....", "If I only had lots of money.....", etc...

The Scripture states; "There is a way that seems right unto man but its end is the way of death." Proverbs 14:12 Take them to the cross first of all, and then you can help them deal with the circumstances and the problems while standing on solid ground. Not so self-centered, but other centered.

Whatever happened that so many find themselves blinded to the way of the cross? The cross is the remedy for feeling hopeless, dirty, guilty, and unlovable. "Just as I am Thou wilt receive, wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve; because Thy promise I believe, O, Lamb of God, I come! I come!"

I will end by saying that a lot of healing would be experienced by bowing the knee at the cross. While at Vacation Bible School at my home church this week, I got a picture of the message and power of the cross. After the closing prayer, a precious little girl named Emily tapped me on the shoulder and said; "You didn’t bow your head." I asked her to repeat what she had said as I wasn’t sure I heard her right. She again said; "You didn’t bow your head." "What do you mean?", I asked. She said; "When the preacher was praying, you didn’t bow your head." "Oh, I'm sorry." I said. She put her arms around my neck, kissed me and said; "That’s okay." Certainly, irreverence toward God or any other sin toward God is a serious offense and is not ‘okay’. But what touched me was the expression of love by this little girl that was given so freely after my confession. I immediately reflected on the sacrifice of Jesus "who saved a wretch like me." The message of the cross burst vividly in my soul once more!

Do you need someone who cares? Flee to the cross in the spirit of repentance. Jesus is there waiting to embrace you, kiss you and forgive your sins.


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Spiritual Warfare "2007"
Rev. Don Loss

Answering the call to the ministry, I left a career in the U.S. Army in 1980, and entered Columbia Graduate School of Bible and Missions in S.C. During the summer of 1982, I completed an internship at Bethel Colony. On January 1st, 1984, I was hired as Associate Director of Bethel Colony and have held that position for 23 years.

As Associate Director, my responsibilities include counseling, teaching, and preaching the Word of God to men in addiction to alcohol and other drugs. Having been instructed well in the methods of nouthetic counseling, I used the Word of God to address the difficult issue of addiction. After a season at Bethel, I noticed many relapses in the men that came through Bethel Colony and then left in seemingly good standing. Seeing that something else needed to happen for these men, I began to investigate the possibility of demonic strongholds.

When Paul Ritchie was hired as Executive Director in 1986, I was pleased to discover that he came with experience in the area of demonic strongholds. We began to fight together against these strongholds.

As the ministry grew under this new directorship, I took on the ministry of deliverance. Since that time, we have found that students who experience deliverance are less likely to go back into addiction than those who do not. Certainly, deliverance is not the end of the story. These men must continue in the various means of grace God has provided for them as believers. Regular church attendance, prayer, the study of God’s Word, quiet time, worship, fellowship among the people of God and putting on the armor of God daily are all essentials to maintaining one’s deliverance.

Many pastors are confounded with the problem of addiction and we sympathize with their dilemma. Some believe it is a medical/clinical problem and send the addict to a psychologist or psychiatrist. There are times when this is warranted; especially in the case of those with suicidal thoughts and/or panic attacks. The addict may need to be stabilized in order for him to be able to respond to Biblical counsel.

Once the addict is stabilized, the Word of God is used to minister grace and to help heal their wounded lives. Many addicts are dealing with failure, rejection, bruised emotions from past trauma, depression, fear, guilt and shame. Repentance and/or salvation are the first steps to breaking any bondage. All issues of the past will have to be dealt with by repentance, acceptance, and identity in Christ. In The Bondage Breaker, Neal Anderson does a great job of pointing a person to Jesus Christ as the One who will set them free.

We appreciate all that are involved in this devastating war on addictions. At Bethel Colony, we have gone further in ministry by advocating John 8:36 which says; "If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed." It comes down to a power encounter with our adversary in order to free people from addictions. We see from Luke 8:29, the crux of the problem with the Gerasene demoniac. "He (Jesus) had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For it had often seized him, and he was kept under guard, bound with chains and shackles; and he broke the bands and was driven by the demon in the wilderness...:" It was only by a power encounter that the enemy was able to be driven out. As one preacher in Africa has been quoted; "You Americans counsel demons; we cast them out."

Bethel has taken this last statement with great consideration and has gone with Jesus’ charge to his disciples in Mark 3:14 & 15; "... He sent them out to preach, and to have power to heal sicknesses and cast out demons."

There is much to be said about the ministry of deliverance and we would be glad to help any who are interested. Here are a few resources you might consider:

The Adversary, by Mark Bubeck, is a very powerful book which addresses praying doctrinally against the enemy.

They Shall Expel Demons, by Derek Prince, is an excellent resource for understanding the grounds for giving place to the devil, Scriptural examples of the demonic, some illustrations of the demonic, the preparation and process of deliverance, and how to keep your deliverance.

The Strategy of Satan: How To Detect and Defeat Him, by Warren Wiersbe is a good follow-up resource.

These are just a few resources which we think will be helpful if you are entering the arena of Spiritual warfare against demonic forces.

In the King’s Army,


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The Whole Armor of God "2007"
Rev. Don Loss

Greetings to our friends of Bethel Colony of Mercy. We count it a privilege to serve the Lord Jesus Christ in order that we might be of some help to those who are looking for answers to life’s problems. I started out writing on another subject for this Counseling Corner and ran into a wall. Then I began to think how God would have us to remember the Apostle’s exhortation to put on the full armor of God in Ephesians 6:10.

I could say a lot on this topic from my own experiences, but I know that there is so much more to learn. I just picked up The Christian In Complete Armor, by the Puritan writer, William Gurnell. I bought this book when Cathi and I first got married, 28 years ago. We were living at Ft. Polk, Louisiana and I was a curious and avid reader. I was fascinated with John Newton, who wrote the famous hymn, "Amazing Grace". He said if he might read only one book besides the Bible he would choose The Christian In Full Armor . Little did I know that one day I would be at Bethel Colony of Mercy putting on the armor of God daily to protect myself against the violence of our enemy, Satan.

One of my recent students, a good soldier in this fight, felt the weight of heaviness come over him as he reflected on an incident that happened in his life several years ago. It was one of those events that etches its’ way deep into the conscience. That word, ‘etch’, is derived from a German word meaning to corrode, to eat into, to make an impression. As this man dwelt on the event, it made such a deep impression on his soul that he needed deliverance from the spirit of heaviness. He had given ground to the enemy by reflecting on this sad and painful memory which had occurred years ago. He thought he had already dealt with it and was free from the effects of it. But, by dwelling on the event and neglecting to put on the armor of God, he was ambushed by the enemy who is always looking for an opportunity to assault a vulnerable child of God.

Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil" Ephesians 6:11

Now, knowing this truth, I’m going to challenge those that are in Christ to use the armor that God has provided for us in this spiritual warfare. This is what I suggest you do during this upcoming Christmas season:

1. Recall the difficulty that overwhelms you during the holidays. (Caution - Don’t reflect; just recall the event. Never park in a negative mood. Build a bridge and get over it.)

2. To etch in your conscience the command to put on your armor, I would challenge you to write out the passage Ephesians 6:10 - 18 once a day for seven days. The Holy Spirit will then have the opportunity to pull this up into your memory when the battle concerning a past painful event starts to erupt in your mind and your emotions.

3. Take notice of the particular pieces of the armor in Ephesians 6:14-18 (NKJV): Belt of truth, Breastplate of righteousness, Gospel shoes of peace, Shield of faith, Helmet of salvation, Sword of the Spirit (which is the Word of God), All prayer.

4. Begin to pray putting on the full armor of God daily. I personally start with the head, moving down to the feet. For instance, I will pray; "I put on the full armor of God: the helmet of salvation, the breastplate of righteousness, the belt of truth, the gospel shoes of peace, the shield of faith, the sword of the Spirit, and all prayer in Jesus’ Name." Commit this to memory.

5. One last word. The enemy may already be inside the camp; meaning he has lodged himself in your mind and emotions to cause a painful memory to resurface for a specific day of battle. To fight this, use the weapon of prayer with authority. Pray out loud if you feel heaviness coming on. "I command the spirit of heaviness to leave me in the Name of Jesus. I submit to God, resist the devil and you (spirit of heaviness) must flee." James 4:7

Note: If you have a spirit of bitterness towards anyone; you must forgive them in order to be on good ground. Failure to forgive will impede your deliverance.

Blessings on all of you that have been our fellow saints in the faith! If this article helps you this Christmas, please write or email us and share your victory with us.

In the King’s Name,

Don Loss


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Unforgiveness "2006"
Rev. Don Loss

Another rampant violation of God’s law among believers is the sin of unforgiveness. An unforgiving spirit can occur as a result of abandonment, rejection, hurt, pride, anger, unresolved conflict, jealousy, envy, covetousness, sensitivity, abuse (physical, verbal or sexual) just to name a few. The sense of being wronged, warranted or not, seems to be the main root. Once anyone makes the decision not to forgive there is conception which "gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death." James 1:5

We all know of relationships where unforgiveness is harbored and the love that two people expressed for one another has died. No amount of reasoning with them to forsake their sin has prevailed. For, you see, when one has built up a justification for his attitude in his mind, he has entrenched the belief that he has a right to feel the way he does. A callousness of indifference sets in that hardens the heart and he is truly taken captive by the "deceitfulness of sin". Unknowingly that person has fallen short of the grace of God, with the "root of bitterness springing up causing trouble and by this many become defiled". Hebrews 12:14-15

I wonder how many have said the Lord’s prayer without taking note of "forgive us our trespasses AS WE forgive those who trespass against us...Mat. 6:12 And further on we read, "For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. BUT, if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. Mt 6:14-15 In other words; what you have sowed in your heart, unforgiveness, resulting in anger and bitterness toward another, will be reaped in your own heart. You have opened the door to receive the same emotion you poured out on another causing all types of emotional and physical cancers of the soul and body. And God, who wants the best for you, would heal your broken heart and set you free if only you would repent of this murderous sin. Isaiah 61:1

Let us look at Ephesians 4:30-32; "Do not grieve the Holy Spirit." How do we do this? Paul tells us in verse 31; "Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice." That would require repentance. "And, be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you."

Is it possible that you can be free from the bitter spirit of unforgiveness that has calloused over from wounds of the past? Oh, Yes! God’s grace is sufficient to help you. A writer of fiction, Flannery O’Conner, wrote; "Grace must wound before it may heal." For you see, the pains and wounds of the past have hardened, and you must understand the knife of the spirit of conviction must lance your calloused sin of unforgiveness before healing will manifest itself in your life.

You ask how this is done. Start by listing those you have unforgiveness towards. Then, make a list of their offenses against you. Follow that up by your response to their wrongdoings. Then take each person on your list and ask God to forgive you for not forgiving them. Follow this up by forgiving them. Then you will experience the softening of your heart towards those who wronged you and the love of God ministering to your wounded spirit from past hurts and abuses.

I challenge you to get with God and begin forgiving those you have anything against. Then, write or email us and let us know what God has done as a result of your obedience to Him. May our God richly bless you.


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The Cry for Gentleness "2006"
Rev. Don Loss

In my years of counseling at Bethel, I have seen much unforgiveness, resentment, rage, blame, slander and other self-centered attitudes. Self-centeredness naturally exhibits a lack of gentleness towards others. A person must first identify and repent of his own sin before he can exhibit a spirit of gentleness on those loved ones he has wounded with words, looks or physical abuses. This gentleness is a sweet smelling aroma of the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23. It is a balm of healing on those who have been wounded deeply. Looking at Webster’s dictionary, I see gentleness defined as "free from harshness, sternness, or violence". My heart grieves over the wives who have experienced harshness, sternness or violence from their husbands instead of gentleness. Webster then goes on to define gentleness as "soft, delicate". My question to men who may be reading this is: How long has it been since you have been "soft and delicate" to your wives and children? And, not to exempt wives from their responsibility, though it may be hard, you must also die to that fiery dart of pain that’s entered your soul and ask God to give you the "balm of grace" from above to not return evil for evil. Romans 12:14-21.

There is a spiritual law found in James 4:12-17 that says when "bitter envy and strife exist, confusion and every evil thing are there" and it brings an atmosphere that is "earthly, sensual and demonic". This is why drug and alcohol abuse give place to so much heartache and heartbreak. It is the catalyst to spiritual darkness over one’s home.

But, on the other hand, there is wisdom from above that is "pure, then peaceable, GENTLE, WILLING TO YIELD, FULL OF MERCY, and good fruit..." And the scripture goes further to explain that those who act out of the wisdom from above have exhibited the fruit of righteousness and have sown peace in their relationships.

It is my experience that all of us are looking for gentleness. We want to be treated with dignity. We long for someone to come alongside of us and give encouragement, kindness and understanding. Even in our frustration, ugliness and anger we are still longing for someone to be gentle toward us.

In a recent counseling session with a Bethel student, I sensed a tension rising up between the student and myself. I was raising my voice and so was he. I knew that the dialogue had passed the point of resolution. By God’s leading, I resigned to the fact that we were not going anywhere and I gently said something to him. Out of his mouth came the Scripture; "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Proverbs 15:1. At that point, we both entered into the atmosphere of wisdom that comes from above and we had a peaceable counseling session.

Are you harsh, bitter or jealous with someone you know? Take your sinful attitude to God, confess it and ask God to forgive you. Ask the Lord to give you the spirit of gentleness so that you might be a blessing to the one who needs you to be gentle towards them. Make a conscious effort to be gentle to someone you’ve hurt, ask their forgiveness and start ministering to them in a spirit of gentleness. They are crying out for it!

May the Lord bless you. Be gentle!


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What Is My Purpose "2006"
Rev. Paul Pruitt

One of the most discussed subjects in the world is "What is my purpose?" As a believer you will learn that is entirely the wrong question. That question causes us to focus on us. We were not created to fulfill our purpose but to fulfill God’s purpose. So it’s not; "What is my purpose," but; "What purpose have you designed me for Lord?" "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. " (Romans 8:28 NKJ)

Too many times I see a person come to Bethel and get their life right with God but still fret. Or, an even bigger concern; not care about what they are supposed to do in life. What they are in some way understanding is that God has a moral will for their life( ...exercise yourself toward godliness (1 Tim 4:7 NKJ) and they have not been living according to that will. So they surrender to Him and follow His moral will and begin to reap that blessing of obedience. "For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life." (Gal 6:8 NKJ)

What one soon will figure out is that this is not the whole revelation, to sit on a pew and be a good boy. God has a moral will for your life but He also has a ministry will for your life: "And say to Archippus, ‘Take heed to the ministry which you have received in the Lord, that you may fulfill it.’". (Col. 4:17; NKJ). If you have been called by God to salvation, you have also been sent by God into service.

This is part of the struggle since the beginning - to be independent. Gal. 5:1 says; "Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage." Christ set us free from sin; but not from Him. We are to be dependant on God. This is the age old question; "Who is going to be Lord of my life?" Not just my job or my Sunday or my behavior, but; my life. Will I make Him Lord or co-pilot? Not only is this partial revelation but it is also partial obedience. In my book, that is merely convenience.

The call on the people of God is to go and make disciples (Matt.28:19). I don’t know what or where you are called to serve, but I do know that you are. You may be asking the question; "How can I find out?" I would suggest the following steps:

1)Get in God’s word. "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened." Matt. 7:7&8 (NKJ).

2)Start using your gifts and talents for Him in any way that gives Him glory. Learn to stop looking at your abilities and start seeing that all things are possible with God. (Mark 10:27).

3)Be faithful in the small things. "His lord said to him, 'Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord." Matt. 25:21 (NKJ)

4)Always give Him praise in what He is doing through you.

5)Step out in faith and do not look back. 1 Thes. 5:24, says; "He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it." (NKJ)

Before you can follow through these steps you have got to stop seeing what you want to do and start asking what He wants you to do. 2 Tim. 4:5 says; "But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry." (NKJ)


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Third in a series on Christian Integrity  "2005"
Rev. Don Loss

Let us continue the subject of Christian integrity by addressing deception. It is one thing to lie, but it is another to deceive. The liar lies out of habit and does not necessarily plan anything in his lying. He just wants to put himself in a good light. The deceiver has gone further in that the lie is the stepping stone to his well-thought-out schemes to get his desired end. You will find him manipulating and scheming very artfully and craftily. All of us have been amazed at those whom we sense have deceived us but we cannot get a handle on it. The reason is that the deceiver becomes a master of deception as a result of being taken captive by the Master Deceiver; Satan himself. "So the great dragon was cast out, that serpent of old, called the Devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world". Revelation 12:9

Satan is constantly at work deceiving believers. Paul states his fear for the church at Corinth in II Corinthians 11:3; "But I fear, lest somehow, as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, so your minds may be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ." I am also reminded of Paul’s words to Timothy in I Timothy 4:1-2; "Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies of hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron."

Any of us who have dealt with drug addicts, alcoholics, etc., have experienced the effects of those who have ‘given heed to deceiving spirits’. And, in some sense, they have departed from the faith; even though they "have not....learned Christ, if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught by Him, as the truth is in Jesus."

This spirit of deception in a person is one of the hardest to deal with, for human wisdom is not able to cure it. "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in heavenly places." (Ephesians 4:11) But the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, (Ephesians 6:17) "is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts of the heart." Hebrews 4:12.

I encourage you to pray for your loved one who is caught up in deception using the words in Ephesians 1 which Stacy Pruitt prayed for her husband as we shared in our last newsletter. Pray fervently; "the fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." James 5:16.

Discipline may be needed as you continue to pray. You may have to confront the deceiving one and give an ultimatum. You may have to put the person out, as painful as that may be. The one caught up in deception has not come to the end of his rope yet. When the noose gets tight enough around the neck, it will then be an opportunity for the Spirit of the Lord to get his attention. Then the person can cry out to the Lord for mercy and begin to acknowledge his sin against God and man.

Rebuke the spirit of deception in the one taken captive and command it to leave. Light can then penetrate into his soul and tenderness toward God and others can return. And, God can begin to minister to his broken and contrite spirit. What was impossible with man is possible with God. Matthew 19:26

It has been well-said; "Difficulty is the atmosphere of miracles." May our Lord bless and keep you.


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Second in a series on Christian Integrity -  "2005"
Rev. Don Loss

The most flagrant violation of Christian integrity is the lie. The problem with the lie is that it is presented as truth. It is not easily detected as a lie unless the one receiving the lie has information that refutes the lie. While that would be nice, it is not usually the case. And the liar, in his bent on deceiving, will not reveal the truth.

All of us have experienced the difficulty of dealing with one who lies. When we question the lie, the liar proclaims his innocence, turns the conversation around, attacks and ends up protesting how hurt he/she is that we would question what he/she said. But isn’t it just the opposite? The one lied to, trying to get at the truth, ends up being hurt, confused, burdened, wondering if perhaps the accusation was uncalled for. So it would seem deception has reigned and the liar goes off justifying himself. Lying is difficult to address because the lie is set in a foundation of stone that does not easily chip unless truth comes to the rescue.

If you are guilty of the sin of lying, you must face it promptly and deal with it aggressively. In Proverbs 12:22, the Scripture states; "Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord. But those who deal truthfully are His delight." God will judge the liar according to Revelation 21:8; "But for the cowardly and unbelieving and abominable and murderers and immoral persons and sorcerers and idolaters and all liars, their part will be in the lake that burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death."

Any true believer in the Lord Jesus Christ should be shocked that he would even consider lying since it is such an offense to God. Sadly, many professing Christians are lying and causing hurt, confusion and deception, spilling out an environment that causes so much damage, especially with the ones that are closest to them.

So, what must be done? You must acknowledge your sin before God, confess it, ask forgiveness for it and make a commitment to forsake it. Then go to the person or persons you have lied to and confess to them, ask forgiveness from them and make any amends that may be appropriate. You must then be aggressive in attacking the stronghold of lying. Be on the alert at all times for its resurfacing. Old habits don’t die easily. Practice, practice, practice telling the truth and God who redeemed you will be delighted. "But those who deal truthfully are His delight"

God bless you.


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The first in a series on

Christian integrity... "2005"
Rev. Don Loss

As a result of counseling over the years one of the things that concerns me is a lack of integrity in some professing Christians. The Oxford American Desk Dictionary and Thesaurus defines integrity as moral uprightness; honesty. An example of integrity is recorded for us in Job 2:3: "The Lord said to Satan, ‘Have you considered my servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil? And still he holds fast to his integrity, although you incited Me against him, to destroy him without cause.’"

Let’s first focus our attention on the moral uprightness aspect of integrity. While attending a volunteer appreciation dinner at our local pregnancy care center recently, I was impressed with the executive director’s emphasis on the importance of teaching and counseling young people in the area of ‘sexual integrity’. Rather than talking about with-holding something from them, young people are encouraged to uphold moral uprightness in their lives. I thought to myself of the multitudes of professing Christians that hold to nothing close to this kind of sexual integrity and display little or no guilt or shame.

I have counseled many men who eagerly proclaim a love for Jesus Christ and at the same time admit that they are living with girlfriends or are dating women who are married to another man, committing adultery without shame. They tell me that they plan on getting married and that God understands that they love one another and that sexual activity in their relationship is nothing to be concerned about. Obviously the lust of the flesh is so entrenched in their thinking that to be grieved over sinning against the Holy Spirit is beyond their conscience. The conscience has been seared and there is an evident lack of sexual integrity.

II Timothy 3:4&5 speaks of those who have a "form of godliness" who are "lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God." And, I Thessalonians 4:3 says; "For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that you abstain from sexual immorality." Hebrews 13:4 tells us of God’s judgment on such activity; "Marriage is honorable above all and the bed is undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge." I could go on and on but I want to help you deal with your sexual immorality and begin to submit yourself to a life of sexual integrity.

First, you must forsake all sexual immorality no matter what form it takes. In order to forsake it you must feel guilt and shame over your sexual immorality. You’ll never stop your indulgence unless you agree with God that it is wrong. Upon acknowledging the wrongness of it, confess (agree with God) all sexual sin, repent (forsake) and ask God to cleanse you from the sin(s). Ask Him to cleanse your body and mind, especially the fantasies of your lust. Then, forsake all environments that would revive those lusts. Don’t ever revisit those areas of your life again. One of my seminary professors said something I will never forget; "Never kiss a sin goodbye." Be done with it.

After completing the above steps make a decision for sexual integrity. Commit yourself to a life of purity with your body and your mind. And, finally; "Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him." Colossians 3:16&17.


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Refusal to Receive Counseling "2004"
Rev. Don Loss

One common problem in helping a person out of his sin and into a vital relationship with Jesus Christ is the unwillingness to receive counsel. We see this at Bethel when a man leaves without the approval of his counselor. I am reminded of Proverbs 3:5&6; "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths." Part of trusting in the Lord is trusting in the Word of God as your counsel. Proverbs 11:14 tells us; "Where there is no counsel, the people fail; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety."

How many times have you tried to reason with a person that’s gone astray? They have been in church, they have read God’s Word, they know the way. And, yet; they are back in the den of bondage to their particular lust. And, of course, the end of their foolish choice is; "the backslider in heart will be filled with his own ways." Proverbs 14:4.

What is going on with the repeat offenders of the truth? One possibility is that they are holding to a "form of godliness" and are ‘always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth." II Timothy 3:4

I recently confronted a student with the truth of II Timothy 3:1-7 and he responded with the answer; "That’s me!" There’s hope when one sees the truth about himself. But repentance must follow or he will continue in the lie and his wisdom and knowledge has deluded him; "for he has said in his heart, ‘I am and there is no one besides me.’" This spiritual battle cannot be resolved in the wisdom and counsel of the world. It is a spiritual stronghold that refuses to bow itself to the Lord God Almighty!

What can be done in cases like these? My first inclination was to mention warfare prayer while writing this, but the Lord added another dimension to my mind. "However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting." Matthew 17:21. Fasting one day a week for a loved one in captivity is a worthwhile goal. Particularly pray against the spirit of antichrist which resists godly counsel and holds your loved one in captivity. In addition, pray against the spirit of bondage that has held him captive. Isaiah 49:25; "But, thus says the LORD; ‘Even the captives of the mighty shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible be delivered; for I will contend with him who contends with you, and I will save your children.’"

There is hope, my friends, but you’ll need to fight the good fight with prayer and fasting. I suggest you purchase the book by Mark Bubeck, The Adversary. It was the first book I sought to educate myself in spiritual warfare when I arrived at Bethel Colony twenty years ago. May God bless you. Keep the faith!

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Sin Is The Problem!
Rev. Don Loss

Two things were emphasized in the Lord’s admonition to the woman caught in adultery; "Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more". Both ingredients are needed by the sinner. It seems to me in my years of counseling that more emphasis is given the first admonition; "Neither do I condemn you" than the second; "sin no more".

Often a person claims to be a Christian when there is little evidence of it in his lifestyle and he justifies himself by a remembrance of a decision he made for Christ somewhere in his past. Now, it may or may not be a legitimate conversion, but after admonishing a person to "examine yourselves as to whether you are in the faith", (II Corinthians 13:5), many have concluded that they were still dead in their trespasses and sins.

I am often reminded of characters in John Bunyan’s Pilgrim’s Progress. Mr. By-Ends is from the town of Fair-Speech along with his friends, Lord Turn-about, Mr. Facing-both-ways, and Mr. Two-tongues. They all detest the true gospel and confess to never strive against wind and tide. If the way of Christianity seems difficult they will choose the way of compromise. Thomas Scott, D.D., comments on these professors of Christ. He writes, "When rest is given to the church, hypocrites often multiply more than real Christians."

A sinner certainly needs to know that there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1), but let us not stop there. Jim Owen, the author of Christian Psychology’s War on God’s Word, has it right when he says that things have gone away from the truth. The terminology of the day is; "People hurt. They have diseases. They are traumatized. They are addicted. They are dysfunctional. These words fit into a victimized world much better than the words ‘sinner’ or ‘rebel’ or ‘wicked’."

Let me say that sin must be addressed as the root of all those experiencing addictions or bondage. The Psalmist writes in Psalm 107:10-11; "Those who sat in darkness and in the shadow of death, bound in affliction and irons- Because they rebelled against the words of God and despised the counsel of the Most High."

Maybe you need to look at sin as the reason for your bondage. You must cry out as Paul did in Romans 7:24; "O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?" And, of course, he points to Christ who will redeem us from the law of sin and death. "For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him." II Corinthians 5:21. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Counseling Testimony:

Secular vs. Christian

Is the world’s view of what composes a professional man the same as God’s view? I found myself questioning that while at a Christian renewal center for help with my addictions.

When placed under the care of a Christian counselor, I found myself very disillusioned. He hadn’t been trained in psychology nor was he a Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor. This created a conflict within me. Whatever the source or origin of this dilemma is not important. Whether it was my own personal denial, Satan, or just the world’s view implanted in my mind for so long, I did not see him as being qualified to treat me; even though God did. Knowing the Christian lifestyle all too well from growing up in a home that promoted it as the key to success in life made it all too easy to take those values for granted. As I began to open up to Christ again and let Him guide my steps, I began to realize that secular textbooks place man’s knowledge and intellect far above anything else, but my counselor’s Textbook is the knowledge from a God that we cannot even begin to fully fathom. The textbooks of the world teach of chemical imbalance and a disease that we will always live with. His Textbook teaches that we are new creatures in Christ Jesus; "old things are passed away and behold, ALL things are become new". All in all, I had to come to a place where only God’s grace can put us to fully comprehend that there is a big difference between man’s idea of truth and The Truth. That Truth is Jesus Christ.

Bethel student, August, 2004

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Holiday Loneliness
Rev. Don Loss

Soon Thanksgiving and Christmas will be upon us. The holidays can be a time of joy or a time of brooding. Some will succumb to the latter and come under a cloud of loneliness. In reflecting upon their circumstances, a person may say to themselves; "Why does the Lord our God do these things?" Jeremiah 5:19.

You may even share Jeremiah’s emotion of despair. "Woe to me, my mother, that you have borne me". Or, "Why is my pain perpetual and my wound incurable which refuses to be healed? Will you surely be like an unreliable stream as waters that fail?", as Jeremiah cries out to God.

Oh, my friend, I know some of you will be tempted to voice Jeremiah’s words as you reflect on the loss of, rejection of, or abandonment of a husband, a wife, children or parents during the coming holiday season. Or it may be for financial or geographical reasons that you cannot be with your family and loved ones. This can be the time when your brooding sprouts up and breeds further loneliness, self-pity and depression.

Beware that by feeding these negative emotions they will "give place to the devil". (Eph.4:27) And when the devil has you in this place he will then take you further into the ‘Slough of Despond’ by the means of alcohol, drugs, or prescriptions to diabolically attempt to alleviate your loneliness and pain.

Now let me suggest a remedy for this diabolical plot against you. Understand first of all that the Lord cares for you. He knows that there will be times when you will be sad or lonely. We read in the Scripture that we should come to Him when we are feeling this way. "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matt.11:28) "Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you." (Psalm 55:12)

You can come to the Lord in prayer asking Him to relieve the cloud of loneliness and to comfort you. James 4:2 says; "You have not because you ask not." You can pray for your heart’s desire for fellowship with your family. Nevertheless, concede to the fact that it may not happen and accept it. Once you accept your circumstances, you are no longer bound to a disappointing situation beyond your control to change. Your emotions are then set free to focus on more positive things.

I suggest you use the time to give the Lord thanks for His goodness. "Oh, that man would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness!" (Psalm 107:8) Maybe find a place to get away that you can lift up your loved ones to the Lord. Maybe there are grievances that you have against your loved ones that you need to ask God’s forgiveness for. You will be surprised how the Lord will minister to you when you do this.

Some of you have been so self-centered that you need to confess this to the Lord. Being self-centered in itself is a problem. It is all focused on what I want, isn’t it? Ask the Lord to show you where to give of yourself this Thanksgiving and Christmas season and not to be consumed with being a taker. Let love flow out of you even in the most disappointing event that you may experience.

What about praise?! Dig up some praise music and listen to it. It will lift up your heart and subdue the spirit of loneliness.

Think about getting out of the house. Go somewhere that will lift your spirit. Visit a friend that loves the Lord; one that can encourage you and pray for you. Maybe you need to seek out a church or return to church for fellowship with the body of Christ if you have been neglecting that.

Lastly, remember to celebrate the Savior during Thanksgiving and Christmas. "Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you." (Matt. 6:33) Remember that our fellowship is not only with one another, but "...truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son, Jesus Christ." (I John 2:3) Make it a priority to give thanks to the Lord during Thanksgiving. And during Christmas, give praise to the new-born King of kings who has come to give you life. (I John 5:12) Set your eyes on Him and you will not be disappointed.

During the holidays do not mope in sadness; rather; hope in gladness.

Keep this article close at hand if holiday loneliness is a problem for you. I believe the Lord will use it to minister to you. Jesus Christ loves you.



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The Accursed Thing
Rev. Don Loss

The ministry of Bethel Colony of Mercy is to sanctify the men God brings here. This is a process of determining what the need of each student is. Many have had an experience with Christ in their past but through their negligence or recklessness they are totally disarmed by a habitual ungodly mind-set and behavior. They have been taken captive by the devil to do his will (II Timothy 2:26)....and they pay the price.

In Joshua chapter 7, we read of the sin of Achan who violated God’s commandment by coveting and obtaining those things from the city of Jericho which were forbidden. We read in Joshua that Achan took and hid a beautiful Babylonian garment that was an accursed thing and (according to God’s instructions) was to be destroyed. God had warned the people of Israel in Joshua 6:17; "...by all means abstain from the accursed things lest you become accursed when you take of the accursed things and make the camp of Israel a curse and trouble it."

As a result of Achan’s disobedience the nation of Israel was defeated by the people of Ai who were few in number. And God spoke to Joshua concerning the defeat and said to him; "Get up, sanctify the people. There is an accursed thing in your midst; you cannot stand before your enemies until you take away the accursed thing among you."

Bethel’s ministry has been to point out the accursed thing that has caused much sorrow and defeat in the lives of the students. We see multitudes in bondage to their particular lust, whether it be alcohol, crack, cocaine, Oxycontin, Xanax, pain killers, pot, heroin, or something else. For, you see, this accursed thing brings trouble; not only to themselves but to those all around them, especially their families. You that have experienced the latter sadly understand the heartache. But we have a Savior who is able to save to the uttermost.

And those students who are broken, desperate, ready to take wise counsel will be set free. The strongholds are mighty, of which substance abuse is just one of many others that have to be addressed. But through the ministry of deliverance, many who have been enslaved to their addictions are now free, no longer lusting after the accursed things. And families are now having hope again that their dad, husband or son is once again the person he used to be. For the power of the gospel has done its work. "If the Son shall set you free, you shall be free indeed." John 8:36

 

Bethel Colony of Mercy is a 501(c) (3) non-profit organization, gifts to which are deductible as charitable contributions for Federal income tax purposes. Financial information about this organization and a copy of it’s license is available from the State Solicitation Licensing Branch at (919) 733-4510. The license is not an endorsement by the State.
 
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